Ever feel like you have so many different feelings that cannot be put into words…so you just sit there and feel. And you don’t know what to do about it. So you escape, either by watching a movie, reading, talking to someone, getting distracted by life and going about your normal daily routine. But you keep coming back to those feelings every time you have a moment to yourself. When you actually find time to do some self-reflection. When you’re driving in your car, on your way to a job you hate. When no one else is in your house but you, and you’re lonely.
You sit and stare. You think. You remember. If you’re the emotional sort, you cry. You feel past hurts as if they’ve never gone away. You think about people who’ve offended you, or that you’ve offended. You wonder about them. You regret. You tell yourself there’s nothing you can do…the feelings get too overwhelming and you find distraction again, never dealing with the pain.
I’m talking about deep, emotional pain that has become so much a part of you that you wouldn’t know how to separate it from yourself if you tried. It’s got roots, this pain. It’s like an ugly tree that was planted in your soul, long ago. It is YOU. The pain is you. It has been with you so long, that it is your very identity. You are the abandoned little boy. You are the girl whose mother didn’t give you any affection. You are the kid whose dad left you and your family when you were little and never cared about seeing you again. You are the teenager that was bullied in middle school. You are the young adult in the abusive relationship. Again and again you re-live the pain. The lump in your throat wells up. You feel anger and overwhelming, gut-wrenching sadness. And you feel, worst of all, helpless.
It is this pain that God wants to heal us from. He wants to be present in the pain. In the PAST, if we will let Him. He is Help. We are not helpless with Him. He heals the pain by taking us into it, causing us to gently face it and take it into our hands. Here’s what we have to do. We pick it up, lift it to Him and say, “It’s Yours. Heal me. Take it from me. Restore me. And most of all, use my pain to help heal someone else.” And what’s next? Letting Go. Forgiving. Loving, with God’s unconditional love.
We forget that our God is POWERFUL!!! He is so, so powerful. Beyond what we can imagine. Trust in Him, in His ability to heal your pain, to bring you OUT. To set your feet on a solid foundation. You guys just don’t know…my faith is so weak. Even as I type this!! I do not have strong faith. It is a mustard seed, for real! But Jesus said that was enough. I cling to Him. He brings rest to the weary. So stop looking at your storm. The wind and waves. Step out of the boat, onto the water, like Peter did. Keep your eyes on only Jesus, and He will keep you safe. But you must believe! Believe Him as a child does. He said all we need is the faith of a child!
You know how a child believes in something? They just believe it. They don’t question it a million times. They don’t doubt at every turn. For example, they just believe that you will take care of them. They don’t ask, “Mama, are you sure you’re going to provide a roof over my head tonight?” They just know that you will, they don’t even question it. What’s more, they don’t even think about questioning.
So that’s our challenge. To not even think about questioning God and His love for us. Trust Him because He is enough. He will take care of us. So take your pain to Him, because He can be trusted to do what must be done with it. You won’t feel comfortable at first. You won’t want to face it. But go into it while holding His hand and I promise you’ll come out the other side a changed person. Having healed and given it to the One who said to cast all your care on Him…you will be ready to face the rest of your days, one day at a time. And one day, you will find that He has used your pain to help heal someone else.